Dreamer

Because I find myself floating off into imagination, i used to worry that I might get lost one day and so decided to learn how to ground myself. 

Then today I accepted it and said to myself that 

I like floating off into that world where everything is wispy and the words are poetic,

Where the voices from earth are muted and the possibilities need just be imagined.

I’ve seen my future and I know I will float away so thin and dissipate one day to become everything….

So there it is. 

Persephone’s Take

The moment Demeter held Persephone,

She felt complete. 

Her chubby cheeks and doe eyes warmed her and she made flowers blossom any where her daughters foot fell. 

But as she grew, Persephone shone as bright as the flowers that followed her 

And men wanted to pluck her to hold her beauty. 

And Persephone admired the boys who spoke to her and stroked her arm and told her jokes and smiled with longing eyes. 

Demeter noticed and she feared losing her daughter so kept her close by telling her frightful tales of the underworld. 

Hades, tall, dark, and charming, came across the two one day and couldn’t stop staring at Persephone. 

He came close and smelled her sweet scent and gave her the warmest smile. 

Persephone blushed and thought about him all day. 

The next day he came closer and spoke with wit and listened with attention. 

Persephone bantered back and time became still as the two engaged in conversation as the tension of longing grew. 

While Demeter turned her attention to the birds nesting, Persephone grabbed Hades hand and walked away with him. 

Demeter chased after them, but they were already gone and Demeter in a rage froze the world and cried and threw fits. 

Zeus came and warned of her mother coming to take her away, so she quickly grabbed a pomegranite and plucked the red jewels, savoring each seed buying her time to spend with her lover. 

Demeter stormed down to the underworld and grabbed Persephone by the wrist,

Yelling and crying, 

Accusing her for being ungrateful for the love she gave her daughter and the pain she returned instead. 

Persephone cried and begged to let her stay in the beautiful underworld where the moon shone bright and water twinkled with light.  

Demeter refused and Persephone held out her hand with 4 more seeds. Before Demeter could grab them, she quickly shoved them into her mouth, smiling because she knew she had won. 

All those years Demeter’s warnings about the horrors of getting stuck in the underworld helped her to buy 4 months to stay with Hades, and her mother defeated, went home and mourned until Demeter could come to visit in the spring where she would bring the flowers back to bloom. 

Musing nude #13

When there’s so much you want to say that you say “fuck it!” And close your eyes to sleep. 

I do the same thing when I’m shopping and there’s so much I want to buy and say,”fuck it!” And just walk out. 

So I apologize to anyone I left a pile of wanted things and said nothing because sometimes I think I am an ostrich. 

I Fell in Love in Nicaragua


I fell in love in Nicaragua

Not once

But over and over again. 

It was a smile and a gaze

A subtle touch like the evening breeze

The brevity of the affair and

The humidity stenched with the ripe scent of mangos 

Like sex coated with lust 

Under the cool rain drops 

Of a hundred lovers slapping the skin of two bongos

Kissing and laughing in the night. 

I fell in love with Nicaragua 

Not once 

But over and over again 

It was the language of the people

Not what was said, but felt

Each finding a place to go to

Where the howler monkeys called you name out at night

And the frogs squealed with delight 

As the thunder shook the earth

And rattled your heart.

The meaning threaded between the laughter and silence and the exchange of words brief because everyone spoke a different language. 

The language of jealousy left somewhere the mosquitos didn’t buzz and the butterfly didn’t whisper soothingly over your face and arms 

causing your hairs to rise waiting for their touch 

Yet knowing you might see heaven in that same moment after.  

I fell I love in Nicaragua

Not once

But over and over again

And I wrote it In the sand 

Let the wind sweep it away into the sea

And kept repeating myself

Because that one moment lives in my heart not once 

But over and over again

Until I return to the green land that feels like the embrace of a mother

And the warmth of her womb 

Depth Perception

I once saw myself float above my body It freaked me out and I smacked my own face to bring me back. 
My depth perception is fucked. 

Magic


Magic
Do you believe in magic?

Morning rituals with coffee, laundry, and gardening had me in reality

When a strong yet little voice of my two year old demands,”go for a jog?! Let’s go for a jog?! STROLLER?!” And off we go. 

His contentment keeps him silent and I get to look at everyone’s beautiful gardens and guess who belongs to each. 

The house bordered with neatly trimmed rose bushes must belong to a little old lady with permed white hair who prefers tea of over coffee and has nice sons who visit on Sunday’s. 

The house with a variety of succulents, I imagine a couple in their late 60s awaiting retirement and longing for a home on an island they haven’t been to since their 20s. 

Jogging past the groomed green lawn, clean with hedges and nothing more,

Hmmm maybe a young couple who bought their first home and is trying to have a baby when she’s fertile, otherwise they are just polite and lights are out by 9pm. 

Yes I make judgements and will occasionally catch a grandmother out with her kitchen knife clearing away dandelion weeds and washing her trash can or some guy with a cigarette and coffee in his hands rushing off to work, where he times out the day by coffee and cigarette breaks and looks at his coworkers ass to pass the time. 

Then my son finally speaks,”Go home? Hi mr bird! Hi mr bird. Hi clouds. Go home?”

And 30 minutes of seeing the world we come back and rest in front of our own garden where a young family with three kids live. 

And do they believe in magic?

I dare you to watch life grow before your eyes and say you don’t.